Third Time Lucky?

Aussie Mark's seat

Sipping coffee as I stare across the Mekong. Contemplating failed endeavours at the Thai-Laos-Burma tripoint. I'd tried to live here twice before but the universe hurled spanners into the rotating machinery of my life.

Recap

31st October 2006 - 32yo. First time across the Tropic of Cancer. Only 30 days but northern Thailand had touched something deep. I knew I'd be back.

26th October 2013 - Fast forward 7 years to 39 and a failed early retirement in CM. Found work locally and managed to squeeze 3y4m out of it - the longest I'd lived anywhere - sad to leave.

4th November 2019 - Fast forward to 45. I'd taken a pay cut to return to CM but ended up fleeing to Cambodia. Only 4 months this time - gutted - just wasn't meant to be.

3rd November 2025 - Fast forward to 51 and a third bite of the cherry. Planetary alignment? Maybe. Check out the dates - all around Halloween - spooky🎃

The Pot

Kiwi Peter

Aussie Mark slid off the mortal coil after a fortnight's struggle. His demise took a significant toll on KP - the end, a sad catharsis. A few of us gathered for the seventh-day ceremony at Wat Veal Pouch. Love the tiny double-glazed doors on his chedi. RIP cobber.

Another source of anguish was watching yet another Barang feed himself into the gynocentric meat grinder — with depressingly predictable results: financial, emotional, and physical ruin within a few short years. What made this case even more troubling was a public display of gratuitous F2M violence — you know, the kind society insists never happens. Poor sod. These blokes just keep coming, as if on a conveyor belt.

Musings

Shitbox

Anyhow, this was all background noise as I'd contemplate Misesian-praxeology in bucolic coffee shops. What would I change given no constraints? Where would I live? What would I do? Random desires arise but which ones are authentic? What's made me feel most alive?

The answer, looking back, were those two stints in CM. Not the jobs, not the city, not the tourists but weekends away - solo-riding through sublime scenery. Getting the knee down on remote twisties. A 250cc thumper in 2013 and a 500cc twin in 2019. Wow, good times.

Speed, skill, danger - what more can a man want?

I looked at location. Can I do that here? Short answer: No.
Lacks infrastructure, roads and a developed motorcycle market.

I looked at finances. Can I afford it? Short answer: Yes.

Economic serendipity as investments bore fruit.

Liquidation

Joe - $100 moto

In a rapturous moment, $25k of stock was liquidated. 26 days later a pdf lands in gmail - retirement visa - $80 - bosh. Fuck, it's really happening. What next? Where to live? CM? Nah - too big. Somewhere smaller but with an airport and bike dealership. CR? That'll do - at least for starters.

$240 on flights, taxis, buses and tuktuks. $7 on a Monorom fan-room cockroach-special. Sorted.

I only really "owned" three things worth more than $10. Joe took Shitbox for $100. The bed ($100) and fridge ($40) were donated to the landlord. The bed was hard to let go as it's the best mattress I'd ever slept on. He promised to hold it should I ever return - top lad - there's that optionality again.

End Is Nigh

Farewell

Saturday 1st November: Farewell feed and official key handover with Peter, Joe and Kanel.

Sunday 2nd: TaKhmau for a final Sewerside stroll with Tony. The perfect spot for the sun to literally set on this Khmer chapter - the twilight giving the sludge an otherworldly hue as excited locals hauled in catfish from the banks of the Bassac.

Monday 3rd: An early morning tuktuk to Phnom Penh's swanky new airport. The gleaming well-lit three-lane autobahn felt nowt like the Cambodia I'd come to know. A short wait in Bangers before the final slog north.

North

Balcony

There was a bloke holding a sign with me name at Chiang Rai arrivals - had always fancied the "VIP" treatment. Worth it? Totally.

Not a fan of airports/flying so was good to get it all done in a day. Was chilling on the new dig's balcony by 5pm. A new SIM by 7pm.

Jumping Hoops

Toon Army in CR

The first few weeks involved opening bank accounts, SWIFTing loy, immigration + medical certificates, photocopying and driving tests.

And lots of walking. Sunset strolls along CR's old airport runway. Mincing around malls-of-modernity felt absurd after years in rural Cambo - the choice, the cleanliness, the orderliness - mind boggling to a simple Kampotian.

Bumped into the Toon Army outside McDonald's. His smoking-hot girlfriend (taking the photo) and old-skool 80's badge rendering AWOL weak at the knees.

Bike

Honda BigWing 2.0

The administrative pain was worth it to ride a brand-spanking CBR500 out of Honda's showroom. A day before turning 52 - just scraping in before a self-imposed birthday deadline. It was a thrill to watch the odometer tick from 0km to 1km. Despite the weather.

Taking her virginity felt good though I'd done it once before in March 2018. Was awesome to be back in the saddle after reluctantly selling the last one.

So, another 203,400B ($6,300) on top of the 800,000B ($24,700) in a local bank for muh visa. Worth it? Fuck aye.

Maiden Voyage

DoiPanMee - doesn't look real

She was ready for sea trials. A jacket, helmet and gloves had been sourced (~$90) but the skies remained stubbornly grey and drizzly. The first glimpse of blue and we were off like rats up drainpipes.

Chiang Saen first for a butcher's at the Mekong, then DoiPanMee for views bordering-on-illegal, before some minor roads to MaeSaLong. A 220km loop combining fast straights, long sweeping bends and challenging twisties. A solid route to rebuild confidence after a six year absence. I'd dreamt about doing this since 2019 - especially during the Saigon grind - so there was a sense of self-congratulatory gratification as I sipped a posh latte at DoiPanMee.

Gratitude

Bokor

I miss Kampot. Was there 3y5m. Got fit, practiced meditation, cooked healthy meals, learned Khmer, fine-tuned investment strategies, made some great friends and, crucially, maintained a low USD burn rate which ultimately enabled this move.

A minor consequence of the time there is that my Thai is now peppered with Khmer - drawing perplexed reactions. You can see the cogs turning - this dude clearly speaks Thai but ..... incoherently. Hope this fades quickly as it's annoying, but you can't undo years of conditioning overnight.

Redemption Arc

So here we are, on the banks of the Mekong, admiring the mechanical horse parked nearby - so new - so shiny - perfectly encapsulating the sum total of human ingenuity. Beautiful. You could even say the Japanese have synthesized art and engineering - though that reads like something you'd see on a QTS-er's CV.

Meanwhile, the mind runs its background subroutines, performing its unrelenting dance. How did I get here? From Ashington to SSBNs to the Mekong? What am I doing? Who am I? What is "all this"?

Before returning to la question du jour: Will I succeed this time?

Rainfall: Pot > CR

The first two attempts were somewhat fragile - relying on visas with counter-party risk (i.e. employers or language schools). This time hinges on two factors: being over 50 and not skint. Perhaps more robust? Who knows? The age component is baked in but whimsical capital markets offer no guarantees and the last few months have been brutal. The future remains, as always, uncertain. Time will tell.

At least I get to enjoy geo-independence this time, not tethered to a job. And it should be a bit drier than where I've been ..... while it lasts.

He who dares Rodney. He who dares.